Greetings my friends. We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to find the rest of our lives. And remember my friends, future events such as these will affect you in the future. You are interested in the unknow, the mysterious and the unexplainable. That is why you are here. And now for the first time, we are bringing to you the full story of what happened on that
fateful day. We are giving you all the evidence based solely on the testimony of the miserable souls who survived this terrifying ordeal. The incidents, the places... my friends, we cannot keep this
a secret any longer. Let us punish the guilty, let us reward the innocent. My friends, can your hearts stand the shocking facts about...
GRAVE ROBBERS FROM OUTER SPACE?!!
A BEGINNERS GUIDE TO THE WORST MOVIE OF ALL TIME
Is Plan 9 the worst movie of all time? It's not a tough question to answer. Yes it is. It really is the most flea ridden arnateurish waste of celluloid and sticky back plastic ever to be foisted onto
an unsuspecting and undeserving public. Nobody should have to sit through this film without some advance warning of the absolute futility of the whole shambolic rambling mess that it is. If you
think that this is overstating the case somewhat, then you obviously haven't sat down and watched the film. But be warned. When you die and go to Heaven, and God is asking you to account for your time, and you say 'Well, I attempted to use my time as profitably as possible', don't be at all surprised when He retorts 'Get real mate, you wasted at least seventy eight minutes watching Plan 9 from outer
Space.'
The film's creator was one Edward J. Wood Jr, who had previously directed the likes of 'Glen or Glenda?', also known as 'I changed my Sex' and 'Trans- vestite' in 1953, and 'Jail Bait' in 1954. Plan 9 originally appeared way back in 1959, and was doubtless an attempt to cash in on the popularity of science fiction and all things shiny and saucer shaped in the fifties. It is an unmitigated disaster. The
first thing you will notice when watching the film is wood. Wooden sets, wooden gravestones, wooden acting and a wooden script. The emotionless and tired way in which the lines are thrown after each other possibly owes a lot to the profoundly uninspiring and lifeless script, penned by the man himself.
Perhaps the two main things which draw people to the film are a macabre fascination with the notion that the film was a genuine attempt to make money, and the fascination with being able to experience over and over one mans profoundly inept attempts to make a half decent movie. Edward Wood called it his little jewel, but it's practically impossible to see why. Plan 9 From Outer Space is a film makers nightmare-crumbling gravestones, night to day to night in the same chase, unbelievable dialogue-the list is endless. But that is enough about the film- you can watch it for yourself. Before you do, however, we will leave the final word to Harry and Michael Medved who have done more than anyone else in bringing Plan 9 from Outer Space to the undeserved attention of the public.
It is easy to understand this movie's enduring hold on the imagination of the public; once you have seen Plan 9 you can surely never forget it. Though reviewed by few critics at the time of its release, the film has left an indelible impression on the handful of sci-fi writers and Hollywood historians who have encountered it over the years. "By far one of the worst films ever concocted," observed
Vincent Beck in Heroes of the Horrors. "Plan 9 is so very bad that it exerts a strange fascination," reports John Brosnan, author of The Horror People. "It appears to have been made in somebody's
garage."'*
Enjoy the film. More importantly, enjoy the game. Be careful though-My
friend, is your heart ready...?
*The Golden Turkey Awards, Harry and Michael Medved
Also read my beginner´s guide to getting started playing abandonware.
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